Delaware teachers are not responsible for dysfunctional familes

Behavioral health program at schools sets more ambitious goals in state rollout Written by Kelly April Tyrrell and Esteban Parra

This year, the state is looking to hire 30 licensed professionals, such as social workers and mental health counselors, to serve as middle school behavioral health consultants in each district. Some schools will get their own, and some will share.

A request for proposals to do the hiring is out now through Sept. 12, using part of the $2.8 million in funds made available to DSCYF by the General Assembly.

The project places behavioral health consultants in Delaware middle schools to provide everything from suicide risk assessment to substance abuse and trauma screening. They also refer families to agencies or organizations like Duffy’s Hope, which can provide a constructive outlet for youth.

FYI middle school intervention might be a little too late for many students. We need to get real with school guidance counselors and have two in schools with high frequencies of behavior issues! One trained counselor serving as a crisis interventionist and the other as an academic, career and college preparation counselor. However, “anything” that brings more mental-health professionals in our schools is welcomed! But please don’t put these people under the authority or direct supervision of school districts, charters and school principals. Also let’s not forget about the “Division of Child Mental Health Services”. And  then there is the “Division of Youth Rehabilitative Services”. When talking about collaboration these organizations need to collaborate with the schools and each other. If we’re going to get serious about “wraparound” services let’s do it!

The time to stop blaming teachers for failures within the family and community is now! Children from dysfunctional families and their parents aren’t singing praise the Lord, Race to The Top is here to save us or the Smarter Balanced Assessment will cure all! YOU CAN’T TEACH CHILDREN WHO ARE NOT WILLING TO LEARN AND WITH PARENTS WHO DON’T GIVE A RAT’s ASS!     

40 responses to “Delaware teachers are not responsible for dysfunctional familes

  1. Dennis Thornton

    Smartest thing you’ve ever said.

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    • lastDEconservative

      I thought about debunking your claim. After a minute, I changed my mind. By the standards that rule the day in this Kilroy corner of the world, you may well be right. His “cure” has an enormous price tag, far more than that of “transparency, transparency, transparency.” And isn’t that the gold standard? How much (more) can almighty government spend … not accomplish … spend; and how much more can the almighty capital S State dedicate to the unwilling and/or unable … not to the contrary.

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    • lastDEconservative

      Not only NOT TO the contrary, but at the EXPENSE OF the willing and able.

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  2. There is some validity in your closing remark, but what do you then suggest? Write off kids with learning and emotional disabilities and less-than-perfect family support?

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    • lastDEconservative

      Let’s consider Kilroy’s OPENING remark, the title: “Delaware teachers are not responsible for dysfunctional familes [sic].”

      Your question suggests that I am responsible. Why is that, SN?

      And Kilroy, why are only teachers exempt from blame for something not their fault? Same question to you as to SN; why does that blame shift to me (the taxpayer funding all this handwringing interventionism; and/or the parent whose willing child is suffering by having to sacrifice instructional time in a classroom with misfits requiring *demanding* all the attention)?

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    • kilroysdelaware

      ” YOU CAN’T TEACH CHILDREN WHO ARE NOT WILLING TO LEARN AND WITH PARENTS WHO DON’T GIVE A RAT’s ASS!”

      Surely many teachers try and some go through the motions to help these kids but they have other students to teach and who are engaged and willing to learn! Should school / district psychologist be rated like teachers? We need a system that better holds parents accountable for their children’s school behavior and through that process help might come for those parents aka support. However, all fingers points to teachers! There is only so much a teacher can do to support students in need of personal not educational help.Parents should be held accountable for truant children not teachers via their ratings.

      We don’t write-off children, we help them with the right help! We don’t go to our family doctor to get a tooth pulled. So children with behavior issues and family issue can’t be “effectively” treated by a teacher with a degree in teaching! Adding the mental health counselors is good. ,

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    • lastDEconservative

      C’mon, Kilroy; ‘all fingers point to teachers.’ First of all, that’s not true on its face. Secondly, you of all people, who only see answers coming from the State, and never see consequences due to a perpetrator, are behaving hypocritically. I know, what’s new. If you truly meant what you so flippantly proclaim — that parents should be accountable, then why (again I beg of you to explain) am I, I, I on the hook for the cost and havoc of all these kids that are not mine??? Is the objective to make me give up too, and turn my willing and able child over to you and yours as well??? Sadly, I know the answer is in the affirmative.

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  3. Remind me never to let Kilroy teach children how to swim.

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  4. Famiilies that are so dysfunctional is a problem that will only worsen.
    This is the main reason teacher’s quit after 5 years on average. I saw it all in 24 years. There is no fixing this for no institution can fix poor choices made outisde of school.

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  5. There is an issue with holding parents accountable. It is only talk;. It can’t be done. Think of how you would do it? Send an agent to camp on their living room floor? Send a policeman to their door to imprison them? Who then takes care of the kids, an orphan’s home?

    The idea behind freedom, is you can’t make people do things. They are allowed to do what they want. Completely missing from this argument is that both parents have to work in today’s society. Expecting them to teach Einstein’s General Theory of Relativity to their children, is a cop out.

    Expecting them to check their children’s homework, is also a cop out. “Did you do it?” “Yes” “Ok, go to bed after this show, it’s late.”

    That is why saying “it’s the parent’s fault” is equally as shallow as saying “it’s the teachers fault”.

    In truth, it is our system’s fault. Our economic system that glorifies paying a company’s employee the tiniest amount possible, and working them as long as one legally can by law; our system that glorifies letting those with money keep it to themselves, and force everyone else to suffer the consequences; a system that lets those with money raise the costs of what they sell, energy, food, housing, medical, insurance, without giving up any of their margins, to pay their employees enough to keep up with their raised costs.

    That is the real problem. That is the problem families in those countries with which our educational system is constantly demeaned, do not deal with. Finland, Hong Kong, Singapore, South Korea. And that is a problem not even in the educational discussion.

    The reality is: If every family could make enough to hire a live-in tutor, education would be fine. It would stand, that if parents “could” spend more time with their children, education would rise as a result.

    Pointing fingers without signing on to more taxes on those who are sucking the life-food out of society, is misdirected. They need to pay more, so we can fix what is broken.

    And we aren’t talking about raising taxes on anyone here mind you; unless you are one of those corporations, here masquerading as a person…

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    • anotherpcsmom

      I don’t think anyone here is expecting, or requesting, that parents teach their children the Theory of Relativity. However, some of us would like parents to teach children to listen, to respect others (persons and property), and to follow directions. These are lessons that begin in toddlerhood, prior to beginning school. If parents do not fulfill the responsibilities they accepted by becoming parents, what is society to do?

      “Pointing fingers without signing on to more taxes on those who are sucking the life-food out of society, is misdirected.”

      Unfortunately, many of those “sucking the life-food” can barely make ends meet as it is. Requiring them to pay higher taxes would not seem helpful.

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    • lastDEconservative

      kavips, if this rant was not written with tongue in cheek, you are one sick pup.

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    • Are you talking about this Joe Wise?

      So he hired a Glasgow alumni, huh?

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  6. Well, I for one am relieved I wont have to teach Einstein… Whew.

    Again, you are asking to much for parents to teach those “moral” codes. If you work 10 hours, spend 2 hours each day making transfers to get to and from work, how do you expect in one or two hours to undo what society has been putting into your child 24/7?

    Our world makes us, that if we want to teach morals, force us to find means other than a parent to do so.

    And in response to your argument that many of those who can barely meet ends, can’t afford to pay more taxes, well, they are completely off the hook. You only pay taxes on the excess money one has after all expenses have been deducted… Obviously those people to whom you refer, will be paying far less taxes, not more.. But those who have too much money, is to whom the responsibility falls for returning our great society to the level it once was.

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    • What a coincidence, my daughter read some books from my mini-library and taught herself the Einstein Relativity Theory while I was at work trying to make ends meet.

      Interestingly, it is not the most advanced or mind-boggling theory to study or comprehend, not even the E=mc^2 thingie so loved by youtube. It is the Unified Grand Theory that supposed to make the Relativity Theory and the rest of physics come together as The One Grand Theory. BTW, it largely failed and now is not even taught in schools. But if you already know Quantum Physics and looking for a challenge, that is the ticket.

      We are paying for everything with our taxes, whether we like it or not, because our taxes are blank checks. Whatever happen to the idea of “smart money” where one can track his dollars and see where they went, I guess, it only works with bankers counting our money, not with us counting our own taxes paid already.

      If it would have been for me, I would introduce “smart cards” where every cent is trackable and at any time I can dial up my meager 42% taxes paid already and see where they went and why. Better yet, I would make it a “sliding scale” kind, like they already have at the foreign currency exchange and make it so that, say, any pay raises to the politicians will automatically deflate one dollar to one thousands of a cent, whereas a similar pay raise done to a teacher at the school where my kids go to will keep its value. And, of course, any card presented for payment outside of the known places (say, Las Vegas) would decline the payment and mark the card as potentially stolen one. Should one desire to withdraw some cash, he could only do so for thousand of a penny on a dollar. And, for the grand finalle, taxmoney not spent within the period allocated (budget year) go back to me.

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    • anotherpcsmom

      “those who have too much money”…I’ve never heard of anyone who had too much.

      I think it’s ridiculous to say that once you have children, you have no responsibility for helping to form them into responsible, productive members of society. We have many people who believe that their choices should be supported by society (financially and otherwise) and this, in my opinion, is one of the major contributing factors of our decline.

      “you are asking to much for parents to teach those “moral” codes. If you work 10 hours, spend 2 hours each day making transfers to get to and from work, how do you expect in one or two hours to undo what society has been putting into your child 24/7?”

      If teaching morals to MY children is not a priority for ME, for whom should it be? Who should be teaching my children these basics? And I was speaking of toddlers. If parents are only spending one or two hours a day with their babies, they must entrust their children to surrogates who are competent in supporting them in their obligations.

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  7. I am actually very glad they are making an investment in the mental health of our children. Notice that this is through DSCYF not DOE, these are not teacher units these are behavioral health counselors, hired through the Division of Prevention and Behavioral Health.
    While hopefully this is a beginning for the investment state wide in mental health, many of the challenges our children face begin with the onset of adolescence (middle school). Yes there are challenges that children face earlier and there are definite mental health needs for some in the elementary grades if not earlier, I have a friend who is a children’s counselor and am familiar with the ages she is often times working with. Of course many of these mental health challenges materialize into major problems by the time the students reach HS, so middle schools, I believe is the appropriate place to increase support.
    Again these are not educator positions, this is not a Race to the Top Initiative, this really is an investment from the FY14 budget in school aged mental health. I feel pretty confident that this is going to prove to be an investment well spent in the long run and hopefully will have positive benefits for students in not just their education but in their overall health as well.

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    • lastDEconservative

      ” I feel pretty confident that this is going to prove to be an investment well spent in the long run and hopefully will have positive benefits for students … ”

      Why would it not be? Hasn’t every other statist program ever conceived by the mind of liberals, progressives, marxists, and such, funded with the confiscated-by-force funds of the innocent, been “an investment well spent … with positive benefits?” Sure!

      Another sick pup. You and kavips.

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  8. Sammy, it is reassuring to find someone who understands the Unified Theory, and expresses it without going into superstrings. However as with one’s own account, tracking where your money goes, is simply futile, requiring tremendous effort, for the sake of only curiousity. Just determining what goes in, and what goes out, is hard enough sometimes…. The picture equivalent is dumping one’s Fiji water into a swimming pool, and wanting to know where your South Pacific molecules of water went…

    And anotherpcsmom….. if you’ve never heard of someone who has too much, … then you must be one of them. Only deduced by your statement here, I would guess there are quite of few less fortunate than you who would classify what you have, as too much.

    That reflects on you neither good or bad. It is just how people work.

    As to your point, I believe you answered the question you pose to yourself…

    if there is no one teaching morals to children… should society step in and fill the gap? Or, should we just accept that these children will always be a problem, and when they get in trouble, we put them like our ancestors used to, up in the attic, and feed them under the door?

    Obviously, it is better for all of us, is we step in and fill the gap, thereby minimizing our collection of problems we face with society, instead of adding more to it.

    Which is why MHS is on the right track. We need to make investments into our citizens, including those with mental health.

    It is probably safe to say at this point, that the battle between raising children by a village or raising children by a parent, has most decisively been won by the village. It is time to stop debating and start doing, and if we act now, perhaps in 20-30 years, we will all have very comfortable lives..

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    • anotherpcsmom

      kav,

      By American standards, I most certainly do not have “too much” (especially after three years of being unemployed and underemployed). By global standards, we all do. “Too much” is totally subjective and I’ve never known anyone who felt like they had so much money they didn’t know what to do with it all. If there were such a person, however, I think it should be his place, not mine, to determine what he should do with the excess. He’s the one who earned it. He’s the one who should have the joy of spreading it around.

      If no one is teaching morals to children”… that’s one of the responsibilities we sign up for when we become parents. Maybe we need to examine why it is that people feel satisfied to abdicate their roles to others.

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    • We are an entitled society, nearly all of us have too much. 8 year olds with cell phones? not too much, its for emergencies. Cable HDTV with dvr? Not too much, just dont have time to watch it so i tape it. 2-3 cars per household? Its a convenience so my oldest can drive herself places on her own.

      what we have is too much crap and not enough caring. And you want society to step in but what is society? its a group of people united by commonalities. The only commonality we share is the country we live. We are all seperated by nationalities, religions, cultures, customs, traditions, etc. By society you really mean government.

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  9. The best way to teach morals is by example, not by preaching. Advocating that children be “held accountable” by cutting them off from the assistance they desperately need, is not an example of good morals.

    Yes, the DSCYF initiative is a baby step in the right direction. Our middle school had an office with PSYCHOLOGIST stencilled on it. I never saw the door open or anybody in the office. I am convinced it was converted to a broom closet years ago and was left there just for VIP tours.

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    • Did they have full time guidance counselors?

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    • Mike, did you choice your kid/kids into a school that had a ‘safe’ reputation?

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    • lastDEconservative

      “Advocating that children be “held accountable” by cutting them off from the assistance they desperately need, is not an example of good morals.”

      Anyone with a lick of sense knows that government is immoral to start with, but Mr. “I’ve never seen less govt that was better than more” O. here makes a good point, though not by intent. Oh, no. Cutting the children off from the assistance they desperately need is what govt does EVERY DAY, by stepping in between said children and … their parents.

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  10. As a matter of information last year our schools/districts employed 300 Guidance Counselors and 129 Psychologist.
    Should we know what responsibilities have been assigned to these employees?

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  11. What is missing is a definition of “having too much.” To eliminate subjectivity on this subject, I would propose the strictly used economic definition:”that of not being physically able to spend ones yearly income”, From the economic point, if you are taking in more money than giving out, you aren’t doing the economy any good at all. Yourself, yes; the economy, no.

    And on your second topic, saying that is what we (parents) signed up for, may be true for you. But there are a lot of people out there to whom such a concept is foreign concept. Some even think the exact opposite; that one has to teach one’s child to survive by NOT being moral.. most likely because that is how they as children, were able to make it thus far.

    The point I’m making is that we all bring our past into conversations. The only way out in finding a solution, is to disregard all past philosophies everyone has ever had and look at things fresh.. If one does, then one will I’m sure over time accept that we can’t depend on parents as a segment of society to do anything. If we want something to last, to make a difference, we will have to build a system that functions on its own, and parents can use it whenever it suits their needs.

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    • ” From the economic point, if you are taking in more money than giving out, you aren’t doing the economy any good at all. Yourself, yes; the economy, no.” – so what is the definition of ‘giving out’? Unless your money is in a savings account or under your mattress, you are ‘giving out’. Or did I misunderstand your comment completely?

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    • What kind of system or do you just want the government to give you one? and if you bring in more than you spend you are doing teh economy good. You are spending appropriately and the funds extra are invested in your local bank (preferably credit union) those funds are being used for loans to others, their interest paid is making money for the institution, your other funds are being invested in retirement plans which are investing in a range of companies for their growth, from blue chips to small cap. If you are spending more than you make then they system is failing because debt overtakes you, bankruptcy is delcared, institutions lose money and funds constrict.

      ” But there are a lot of people out there to whom such a concept is foreign concept.” – you want a system, here – if a child is born to a person as you mention here, that child is provided free of charge semi-permanent birth control (implanted) through teh age of 30. If they are shown to continue to not have teh characteristics of a morally functioning socitey then a permanent solution is implemented. THis is for both men and women. The parents of these children are automatically rendereed infertile. IF we cant accept the ‘biggest job’ then we shouldnt be allowed to have that job.

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    • Arthur, you’re tongue-in-cheek here, right? These conversations often veer into eugenics, and we’ve tried that (the last state-mandated sterilization in the U.S. took place in the early ’80s, I believe). I don’t think we want the state making decisions about who can/can’t, should/shouldn’t have children. We all know where that can lead–it’s been tried, in many nations including ours–it’s way too dangerous & morally fraught. Name one DE politician whom you’d trust with the power to determine who should have the right to reproduce. I can’t name any, and there are several whom I like & trust on many other matters.

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    • lastDEconservative

      mom, et.al.,
      Do yourself and the rest of us a favor and don’t engage with kavips. He may be contagious.

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    • I appreciate the good words of encouragement. 🙂 i must say howerver, that when one’s debating opponents are reduced to calling you a sick pup, it usually means I am winning. They’ve run out of ammunition.

      Now, name calling is fun. That’s why kids do it, that’s why adults do it, myself included. But name calling back and forth here will help not one single child.

      The goal, is to help children. And, whereas some may think reality is tongue in cheek because it does not fall within their realm of wishful perception, it is still reality.

      Essentially I am arguing for how things ran between 1933 and 2000. We all got along fine then. We were not communists. We had rules and regulations governing capitalism. And… Education seems to have done ok.back then too.

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    • lastDEconservative

      ” … calling you a sick pup, it usually means I am winning.”

      No, it means you are a sick pup. I actually feel sorry for you.

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    • “Essentially I am arguing for how things ran between 1933 and 2000..” you mean when the federal and state government stayed mostly out of local schools/

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  12. Pigeon on the Green

    Well Joey Wise bilks us again. His testing company used by Christina has hired a former Glasgow principal who was booted out, to …..run the testing program for…Christina. The taxpayer gets screwed again.

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  13. Pigeon, what is the name of the company you refer to?

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  14. Have any of you ever lived with a family member who has a mental illness? My 13 year old son lives with one daily. School and living with a chemical imbalance is difficult. He does have outbursts at school, but our family DOES give a rat’s ass, and I am glad the mental health personnel is a public school initiative here. Everyone who criticizes this has never lived through the roller coaster ride of living with mental illness. I usually agree with you Kilroy, but screw you. Maybe if we helped kids more with their mental health, they would want to learn.

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    • kilroysdelaware

      “Maybe if we helped kids more with their mental health, they would want to learn”

      Of course we do and the help is out there! The big question educating parents to seek help for their kids and the family. Mental illness in the family effect the entire family! Also there are issues beyond mental illness that impacts behavior like having a parent in jail. absent parent, family member with cance, a death in the family, divorce and so on!

      Negative behavior is rooted to deep-seeded personal issue and as for children, they don’t get help until the parent finds it for them. MANY children’s negative behavior could be a result of poor parenting!

      For the most part kids are in crisis due to situations beyond themselves and schools do need crisis interventionist.

      “FYI middle school intervention might be a little too late for many students”

      What’s your opinion

      “We need to get real with school guidance counselors and have two in schools with high frequencies of behavior issues! One trained counselor serving as a crisis interventionist and the other as an academic, career and college preparation counselor”

      What’s your opinion

      “However, “anything” that brings more mental-health professionals in our schools is welcomed! But please don’t put these people under the authority or direct supervision of school districts, charters and school principals”

      Do you agree!

      “Also let’s not forget about the “Division of Child Mental Health Services”. And then there is the “Division of Youth Rehabilitative Services”. When talking about collaboration these organizations need to collaborate with the schools and each other. If we’re going to get serious about “wraparound” services let’s do it!”

      Do you agree!
      .

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    • amom, I dont think Kilroy is saying that kids with ilness (mental, physical, emotional, etc) are the problem. I take it as the real issue is the parents who are completely different than you. Those who either dont know, dont care or ignore their kids problems. The parents who have completely dismissed their role and have no concern for their kids future or present for that matter. Those are the larger issue our country has to deal with. You are working FOR your kids. That is to be commended.

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